Attack On Reality
by ProfessorXana
Summary: Well, you know when you are board and it is 1:19 in the morning? And you are tipsy of some sleep drunk? Well, I don't always drink, but when I do, I, don't make sense out of anything and just do a stupid. Remembers kids. Don't drunk when you drive.
1. Levi's Trippy Night

I don't always drink, but when I do. It is when my subordinates drug me up at a party I did not ask to attend to. I can't think, I can't hear, all I have is a static ringing in my ear, gravity pulling on my arms and chest as if I was nothing more than a rag doll. I haven't even opened my eyes yet, but I felt that the world was spinning.

I finally started to sober. As my mind started to clear, I realize I am in a bed. (A bed that was actually comfortable) It wasn't one from the quarters. Wound up in a room. A child's room. I don't know who's room. All I see is darkening figures and shapes all around me. The more my eyes adjusted, I could make out little toys, and a lamp, and the usual bedroom items. The thing I could not adjust to was the multiple eyes that were staring at me. They were freakishly large, I don't know what my options where. One figure was moving towards me, and flashed me in the face with sunshine by pulling a blinds away causing light to instantly fill the room.

"Oh good, you are awake." Said a small boy, that was in serious need of a diet. "We found you just layin down on the beach and you were wet covered in sea-water."

I was covered in sea-water? Did Eren decided for everyone to go swimming or something? We don't even live near an ocean, let alone. I would think to myself before sitting up and looking at my clothing… which wasn't the clothing I was wearing before I went to the party.

"Oh, right. We didn't want you to get a cold. So we let you wear one of Pearl's night gowns." The chubby boy said with a, less than appealing grin.

"Dude, we totally saw you naked, hehe." Another said coming into the room with a purple figure, followed by two other people- her skin was purple.

I was about to open my mouth, and you know. Ask what who they were, and what were they, you know. Typical points needed to move the plot of the fanfiction going, even know everyone else knows who is who already. And if they didn't, you were probably a bad writer. (Such as myself.)  
But sadly, the female titan crashed her head through the wall of the room where the bed was. Quickly opening her jaw and taking a huge bite within the room, killing Steven, Amethyst and I.


	2. It's Mikasa, Isn't It?

Mikasa sighs, as she began to walk onto the stage. In a stunning red strapless dress. She looked so beautiful. Her hair was pulled back with a small braids on the sides of her head. The first time I have ever seen here with lipstick. The host introduced her as we waited for the performance.

"Mikasa looks so great!" I beamed softly out loud.

Eren just took another shot of his liquor, sitting beside me on the circular table. "Meh.." He shrugged. Ether he didn't care, or was extremely gay. I didn't really care, I just laughed. But, Jean on the other hand, who was sitting beside the both of us on the other end of the tablet grunted and glared at Eren.

"Hmph, you don't have any taste Eren."

"I didn't ask you if I did, Horse face"

They looked like they were about to get up and hit each other before I interviewed. "Guys! Cut it out, Mikasa is about to-" I stopped talking as the music was about to play, and it looked like Mikasa was about to sing. Which made the others quite down and look at eas, for now. And Mikasa started to sing, a song I didn't even know. It was sorta, out of this universe…

I was fine, with the men.  
That came into your ships now and again.

I was fine, because I knew.  
That they didn't really matter, until season two.

I was fine, when Erimn came.  
And it he was just to get some small yoai in the frame.  
But now Jean,  
But now Levi,  
And now even Annie too….  
It's over, isn't it?  
Isn't it, isn't it? Isn't it over?  
It's over, isn't it?  
Isn't it? Isn't it? Isn't it over?  
I am the one, who loved you.  
Or have I got it all wrong.  
It's over? Or were you gay, all along.  
Hanji and Marco, no competition.  
But Levi, Annie?  
Such a DeviantArt reputation.  
Who am I now, in the franchize without you?  
A female protagonist, with no damsel like virtue.  
Without your love I wouldn't know what to do.  
Who cares if it is incest.  
That label isn't even true.  
Who cares if you are gay..  
I will get surgery done for you..  
It's over, isn't it?  
Isn't it, isn't it? Isn't it over?  
It's over, isn't it?  
Isn't it? Isn't it? Isn't it over?  
I am the one, who loved you.  
Or have I got it all wrong.  
It's over? Or were you gay, all along.

After that note, Mikasa left the stage.. Everyone's facial expression, was about the same. Ether bulging eyes or confused as ginger in a tanning salon. At least Hanji was clapping, after taking another shot.


	3. Mikasa, Sasha, and Krista, And Armin!

"I will fight for so my friends are at ease, and also so they can all worship me." Krista said while doing a karate-stance in a small Garnet cosplay, working in a big and puffy blonde wig.

"I will fight, so I can eat the potato and live to fight for another tomorrow!" Sasha said pouncing around the scene, with a potato in hand which she lifted up into the air as she made her stance around Krista with a crane-style looking fighting pose.

"I will fight for my O-T-P, so Eren and I can our beautiful ever-after happily." Mikasa said snuggling her scarf, twirling into the middle of behind the both of them.

"I will fight to protect I love and maybe even have a family." Armin came in front.. He didn't do a dance or anything, he sorta just nervously tumbled in there.

"The path won't be though,  
But we all read the Manga so we aren't going to end up like Marco." We sang in unison.

Mikasa- "We,"  
Krista and Sasha- "Are the Crystal"  
Armin- "Gems."  
Unison- "We'll always save the day."  
Armin- "And if you think we can't."  
Unison- "Eren and Levi will some why find away."  
Mikasa- "That's why the people"  
Krista and Sahsa- "Of this franchize,"  
Armin- "Despise."  
Unison- "Mikasa, Krista, and Sasha- and Armin!"


	4. Connie, Three Strikes, You're Out?

After Mikasa, little song. Connie was going to be performing a comedy routine. Which was a relIef don't like drinking, but that song even made me wanting to take a couple of shots or too. I just felt bad for Eren. He looked like he just got hit by a bus. I couldn't tell if Jean was crying or laughing, his head one on the table. I think he was doing both. I just slowly petted Jean's back as I began to pay attention to the club's stage as Connie starts to perform his act.

"Hey everyone, good to see you!" Connie smiled while walking onto the stage, he was always a nice guy. I can't wait to hear his jokes. "Man, that song was great. But anyways, let us start off with a question. Did you guys ever wonder who was the female titan?"

And then, that is when things started to go south.

"Well, if you ask me, it could be, Annie-one." He said with a grin, and tilted his head. Nobody laughed, other than Hanji of course. Everyone looked at Annie, who was a table beside us. I tried my best not to follow the crowd and also do so, but I really wanted to see how she'd react, and gave in. Her face didn't look much different. But, I was just going to be safe and say she is kind of pissed.

"Thank you, thank you very much. I heard Levi, went to move to a different anime, Bleach. He said the'd thought It'd be cleaner there."

I looked over at Corporal Levi. He didn't seem to offend him, and I did hear some other people chuckle. So I guess it was alright.

"Yeah, so he was getting ready to buy a bus ticket out of here, but….. He came up short." Connie did a big smile.

Now this time, when I looked back at Levi, even know he didn't move his body anymore than it was. A shadow casted over his face, no one laughed. Not even Hanji, and she always laughed.- Well, someone people were holding in laughter. But unfortunately, Jean couldn't help himself and bursted out laughing. His laughter was suddenly ended by Levi, getting out from his chair walking to our table, grabbing Jean by the neck and smashing his face into the table, which recoiled him into falling into the ground. Where Levi rapidly pelted him with striking kicks into the face, stomach and groin.

Yeah, Connie just dropped the mike and went running after that. I am just glad he didn't make a Mikasa, your-casa joke.


End file.
